Archive for September, 2010

Lots of things there that you can drink, but stay away from the kitchen sink.
The breakfast garbage that you throw in to the bay, they drink at lunch in san jose.  -Tom Lehrer, 1965.

Recently at a Coffee and Tea trade show in Toronto I witnessed a passionate discussion by a group of coffee geeks much more experienced and knowledgeable than me about the importance of filtration of water. These people served coffee in cafés to the public and to each other in competition, as well as tasting coffee for a living.

The primary issues about water quality were whether the clear liquid touching the sacred harvested grounds of joy altered the taste before it hit the cup. End of story. If the H Two Oh could be improved on in any way, at any cost, it should be done. They did not grow the Lord’s beans to have them wasted by some municipal bureaucracy who did not know about a portafilter or when one sneezes. For someone who is either not tuned into the lingo or is a home brewer like me, these guys might as well be talking Vulcan:

“The system is intriguing–it has an adjustable bypass, and uses a bed of hydrogenated resin (rather than salted resin) to soften the water by reducing the alkalinity as well as the minerals, solving (at least on paper) most of the problems with more traditional softening setups. Of course, there are weaknesses to this system as well, in particular that it’s a proprietary system with potentially expensive replacement filters.” – homebarista.com

The wonderful owners of Mavis Bank Jamaican Blue Mountain Coffee Factory (Senator Norman W. Grant, CEO pictured here) explained to me that they were unhappy with the very expensive coffee filtration system at their retail outlet at the Jamaican Airport in Kingston. They then changed to a system where every day before the store opened truck loads of bottled water arrive at the store. Poul Mark of Transcend Coffee offered similar water expertise to the text above. My own roaster and coffee supplier added that your coffee prep equipment can turn on you, adding oils to the water from previous brews and tap water is disgusting, what with fluoride, hard/soft water and who know’s what else is in there!

You probably by now know that the plastics that go into bottled water are bad for the environment, and perhaps even not so good for you if it’s just nicely labeled tap water. Add to that the possibility the bottle contains BPA and they’re not such a healthy choice after all. – Paul Smith | January 15th, 2010, www.triplepundit.com

Here is where I sat on my hands as I did not have the verbal ammo to state my case. I sell my wonderful, fresh coffee online and I do not get to see what water my customers put in their coffee machines. The address labels on my packages are to all over the world, from major urban centers to one horse towns. For all I know, they may go down to the local river with a bucket to to get the water. I tell them to use one scoop of coffee for each cup of water and when they run out of beans I want them to buy more. They spend seconds on my website to see the coffee, hopefully minutes to read information about how wonderful the beans are and how to order them. At this level and price point, they have some depth of coffee machine or preparation knowledge or they would go to their local shop and not wait 7 days for $50/lb coffee. Adding expense, science or negative information because of water will not sell my coffee.

There, now I have done it. My picture now has a big red “X” on it at the Specialty Coffee Association of America and I am off the list at the next coffee cupping swap meet. Rats. But if the lowest water common denominator in Armpit, Ontario uses tap water with traces of moose poop in it can’t enjoy my wonderful coffee stress free, who can? The taste can only get better. Telling the public on the www to buy subtronic anti microfibrial neutron filters (ok I made that up) to clean their water for coffee brewing is not going to work. Especially when coffee prices are going up daily and you are trying to get $20 a half pound for it.

First, limescale is a trivial problem in brewed coffee makers, so there’s no reason to use soft water when brewing coffee. Second, in good espresso, crema, mouthfeel, and balance play a much larger role than in brewed coffee, so results from a brewed test may not apply to espresso. -Water for coffee FAQ, by Jim Schulman with numerous contributions by others.

My last point I would like to make about the water issue is about what happens after the horse leaves the post, so to speak. You choose your coffee, you send the water through the machine (perfect or otherwise) and you have your paper filter. Fine. The water, coffee and paper have worked their magic, as well as the heat. What about the microns of stuff on your cup from your dishwasher? Or what is in your mouth from smoking, eating, kissing your sweetie or dog? And God forbid, adding milk, sugar or sweetener?

Bite your tongue!

This past weekend in Toronto at the Coffee & Tea Show at the International Centre, coffee geeks and baristas of all walks of life gathered to strut their stuff. A leaf or heart on top of your latte? Don’t make them laugh. Kopi Luwak at $220 a pound? Kitch, cliche and faddy. The language these guys speak is practically Vulcan and I am convinced you need espresso to just to stay awake to get through it.

Later in the afternoon on each day, in a corner of the showroom floor the bravest of the brave did step up to flex their mouth muscles though, yours truly included. To prepare for this contest, we were advised by those who went before us to sacrifice and practice the craft, by forgoing smoking, drinking alcohol and spicy foods for three days. As a cigar smoker, wine and scotch drinker, this was no fun at all. As the newbie of the group who needed to do anything to survive, abstinence it was, fine.

So here is the deal. Read about it here: http://cuptasters.ca/ The competition is fierce and to understand what this is all about, imagine three opaque cups of cola, 2 with Coke, 1 with Pepsi. Mark the Pepsi with a dot or a piece of tape on the bottom. Mix them all around. Pick the Pepsi. There are several issues here. Comparing one against the other is one thing, but in a triad, suddenly your brain cannot tell which is the odd one. Also, you have the added elements of speed. Can the guy to your right do it faster?

Now line up 16 experts and see who does it fastest, only with a bunch of coffees, 8 triangle sets in a row, one after the other. Coffee, unlike soda, has so many different notes to it. In this competition, the hot geeks went through sniffing first, then went back with bizarre long sips. Some were violent slurpers to get as much air into the coffee as possible, spraying the liquid all over their tongues a palettes. The spitting in your cup is also key. Yes spitting. Too fast and the stuff is gone, too slow and you might swallow? I found the big taste after the coffee is spit out. The residual taste told me more.

Before venturing out I contacted some of the judges from the European arm of this competition… these comps are actually held all over the world and ours was the first on Canadian soil. Burnaby BC coffee company 49th Parallel‘s owner Barrett Jones is the USA champion. Some tips I received included trusting your first instinct. Also use a sterling silver or silver plate spoon. A cupping spoon. Cream soup spoons make great cupping spoons or coffee companies often sell cupping spoons. I like sterling so I chose the one pictured above.

Turns out my fussy taste buds and obsessive sense of smell did me well. I was in the first heat of 4 tasters and was beat by Patrick Russell. What a heck of a nice guy from Second Cup. Russell was recently promoted to the role of Coffee Expert, a newly created position imperative to the organizational commitment to coffee integrity and providing superior product to guests.  He is the official taster for the company, working alongside the Second Cup Roaster to taste coffees 112 times before they are released to guests. He went on to win the whole competition, so I guess I can handle losing to him. Congratulations, Patrick!

So many great things to enjoy but we are only human.

Used to be that a $2 allowance could buy you a weekend of just about anything you could desire. I am talking about 1970 here: pack of gum, pop, chocolate bar, movie. And that was only on day one. You could start over on day two. Ask someone older and the list got longer and for less cash of course. Flash forward 40+ years, here we are and my tastes have gone far over the top. I really have to say that treats are now so excessive they are “collections” and obsessions. We have to budget and plan for them.

I have been talking about my “TWENTY-FIVE DOLLAR THEORY” for about a month now and the wise words proclaim this:

“For $25 (at home) you can buy a great steak, a beautiful glass (or two) of single malt scotch, a well researched decent bottle of wine, a fantastic cigar or two, or a half pound of Rocketfuelcoffee. The audience is interchangeable and so talk to one and you can talk to them all.”

OK, fine. Great words from the lady who sells the best coffee in the world, smokes wonderful cigars, eats incredible steak and drinks single malt. But who pays the bills?? At $25 a pop  this is not unlike the budget required for a junior drug addict or compulsive shopper. Either one would require intervention in the hands of concerned family members.

One of the problems with these activities is they are wonderful, deep learning experiences, with hours (and hours) of social interaction. If you were to drink and smoke alone at home, that would truly be sad. But to sip on a coffee and tell about your day over a wonderful new cigar, and tell about the flavors of both? Come on, heaven on earth. So what if you have to throw down another $10 or $20 on the table. That is only paper when you are in the presence of historical greatness – and that may be the fellow sitting next to you.

Uh-oh. Back to planet earth. Our wallets are getting lighter. What to do? Trade of course! Ok, I will give you half a pound of Rocketfuelcoffee Jamaican Blue Mountain for two Cubans, your choice. Surprise me!

Some folks are lucky enough to have greenery flow from their pockets to eat, smoke and drink on demand. For the rest of us, we have to show restraint and either smoke less, drink less or come up with clever ways to keep the fire of community enjoyment going. My new program includes smoking Cuban cigars part of the time and less expensive, modest Nicaraguan or Dominican sticks the rest of the time. Poor, poor me.

Cheers!

A manifesto is a public declaration of principles and intentions, often political in nature. Manifestos relating to religious belief are generally referred to as a creed. Manifestos may also be life stance-related. Pretty heady stuff and you better be willing to fight for it I figure. Since I am no fighter, and would probably end up serving Hawaiian Kona or Jamaican Blue Mountain on the battle field of duty, in nice china cups too, I thought I better give this some thought.

Examples of notable manifestos:

• The United States Declaration of Independence (1776)
• The Declaration of the Rights of Man and Citizen (1789) during the French Revolution
• The Cartagena Manifesto (1812), by Simón Bolíva
• The Communist Manifesto (1848), by Karl Marx and Friedrich Engels
• The Humanist Manifesto I, II and III
• Mein Kampf (My Struggle) (1925), by Adolf Hitler
• The Cannibal Manifesto (1928), by Oswald de Andrade

More recently, a business associate of mine showed me a business document of his he entitled his Manifesto. It basically showed 50 points one should live by, including cliches about leaps of faith

9. Eat Life!
10. Go big or go home
11. I failed and failed again.  Then I became a man
12. PassionPower
13. Laugh big.  Laugh Often.
14. Sexual healing is real.  Marvin was right.
15. HA HA HA
16. I failed and failed again. Then I became a  woman
17. Travel teaches tolerance

Now since I had not put pen to paper who was I to judge? It takes courage to declare your true feelings and opinions in these matters. Other than stating which coffees are preferred and which beans meet the standards of www.rocketfuelcoffee.com, I have not gone out on too far a limb. A couple of wry witties on Facebook or Twitter and that’s about it.

Now I like to write and I figured it’s time for me to write big or go go home (a point in a manifesto if there ever was one), so here goes. And I urge you to print this puppy out and post it somewhere where you can read it each and every day. Preferably with a fresh cup of Rocketfuelcoffee. Let’s begin.

1. We only have so many hours on earth, so spend it with nice people not assholes or nitwits.

2. Marry only once and for true love or money. If it does not work out, then try again.

3. Eat the best food and drink the best wine or Scotch you can afford.

4. Treat your parents like gold. When your kids treat you like crap you will understand why.

5. Cigars are for adults. Weed is for children and cancer patients.

6. Health is of course important, but you might get hit by a bus, so don’t overdo it.

7. If I want your opinion I will ask you for it.

8. No one messes with team Rotenberg (insert your family name here).

9. Just because you are related to me, does not mean I like you. Behave yourself.

10. Be kind to strangers. They have not done anything to you yet.

Oh yes, more coffee?

(This illustration is just here for effect)

In a few weeks I will turn 49 and I have been contemplating the end of the world before I turn 50. So here is my advice to all of you:

Drink the finest coffee in the world in the morning, and in my opinion that is Jamaican Blue Mountain, conveniently available at www.rocketfuelcoffee.com.

Smoke the best/your favorite cigar you can afford in the afternoon, and for me that would be a Montecristo El Mundo.

In the evening drink your favorite single malt Scotch with the love of your life. (Dalwhinnie 15/Matthew)

Now here is my priceless advice that will save you endless embarrassment and why you will remember me long after I am gone (hopefully long after I turn 49 or 50).

If you meet someone and you forget their name, say, “Hello, handsome”, if it is a man, or “Hello, gorgeous”, if it is a woman, no matter what they look like.

You’re welcome.